Marriage & Finances: What’s Love Got To Do With It?
Valentine’s Day is a time to celebrate love, but also an opportunity to reflect on how love influences every part of your relationship—even finances.
Financial planning for married couples is not just about managing money; it’s about working together toward shared goals with trust, understanding, and united purpose.
Yet, it’s surprising the rising number of married couples entering financial planning engagements with separate finances and desire to keep it that way. Blame pre-existing debt (i.e. student loans), divorce rates and desired autonomy to continue not having to answer for personal spending habits.
By combining finances and collaborating on financial goals, couples can set themselves up for long-term wealth. Here’s how to work together as one effectively.
1. Financial Values and Habits
Before combining finances, it’s essential to understand each other’s financial habits, values, and experiences. Are you a spender or a saver? Do you prioritize security or investment?
Sharing how you were raised to think about money, past financial experiences, and your attitudes toward spending and investing can avoid future misunderstandings.
2. Combining Finances
Couples must decide whether to share everything, keep things separate, or take a hybrid approach. While some CFPs say there is no right answer, I don’t encounter $5M+ married households where finances are separate. Sure, a small discretionary account may exist, but so does transparency of it and across the household.
When couples feel they’re underachieving, I’ll see evidence of divided assets, funky income-based ratios to cover expenses and opportunities missed due to each spouse having several unknowns of the other. In summary, a lack of trust prohibits taking calculated risks to generate wealth.
The way you manage assets, liabilities and spending should reflect values and shared vision of where your household is in 3, 5 and 10+ year increments.
If one enters marriage with 6-figure student loan debt, you both work to pay it down.
If one comes from family money, accept offers of assistance that align with your household’s vision.
If one makes more than the other, spending and payments are balanced.
If making a large purchase requiring a loan and/or investments, details are discussed and are to fit into the household’s vision.
3. Setting Shared Financial Goals
Once finances are combined, it’s time to set shared financial goals. These range from short-term goals (saving for a vacation or building an emergency fund) to long-term goals (buying a house or saving for retirement). Start by discussing your personal aspirations and then find ways to align them into a unified plan. Prioritize these goals based on timelines and importance, and be prepared to compromise.
It’s essential both partners feel involved and heard when setting goals. This shared vision will make the process of working together more fulfilling and successful.
4. Budget & Prioritize Spending Together
A budget helps couples allocate income, control spending, and save for shared goals. Start by listing all monthly expenses, debt repayments and automatic savings (i.e. 401k). Separately list one-time expenses expected in coming 1-3 years, such as home improvements, travel, auto, etc.
If cash flow is positive, then monitor your budget and adjust as necessary. For some it’s monthly, others it’s revisited when expected results don’t occur.
5. Transparency and Communication
Just as love requires ongoing communication and transparency, so does financial planning. Working together as a team with check-ins and honest conversations ensures you stay on track, discuss progress toward your goals, and adjust when necessary.
Make sure to celebrate milestones together. Besides keeping each other motivated, it recognizes your power of working together and strengthens your emotional bond.
So, "What’s love got to do with it?"—the answer is simple: everything.
The opinions voiced in this material are for general information only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual.
Glenn Brown is a Holliston resident and owner of PlanDynamic, LLC, www.PlanDynamic.com. Glenn is a fee-only Certified Financial Planner™ helping motivated people take control of their planning and investing, so they can balance kids, aging parents, and financial independence.
The original article appeared in the February editions of Local Town Pages for Holliston, Natick, Ashland, Franklin, Hopedale, Medway/Mills, Bellingham, and Norfolk/Wrentham. Additionally in 1st weekly edition of Community Advocate for Shrewsbury, Westborough, Northborough, Southborough, Grafton, Marlborough, and Hudson.
Please call me at (508) 834-7733 or directly schedule a meeting to learn more about considerations for planning and investing so you can balance kids, aging parents, and your financial independence.
PlanDynamic, LLC is a registered investment advisor. This article is intended to provide general information. It is not intended to offer or deliver investment advice in any way. Information regarding investment services is provided solely to gain a better understanding of the subject or the article. Different types of investments involve varying degrees of risk. Therefore, it should not be assumed that future performance of any specific investment or investment strategy will be profitable.
Market data and other cited or linked-to content in this article are based on generally available information and are believed to be reliable. PlanDynamic, LLC does not guarantee the performance of any investment or the accuracy of the information contained in this article. PlanDynamic, LLC will provide all prospective clients with a copy of PlanDynamic, LLC’s Form ADV2A and applicable Form ADV 2Bs. You may obtain a copy of these disclosures on the SEC website at http://adviserinfo.sec.gov or you may Contact Us to request a free copy via .pdf or hardcopy.